Rick’s Picks 2010/2011
As I haven’t received a lot of feedback (positive or
negative) after releasing the last few ‘Picks, and as free time isn’t what it
used to be, we are choosing to pursue more of a Cole’s Notes format this time
around. Don’t worry, we still get
our fair share of rips in, and I’m just drooling at the chance to make fun of
Cole’s drafting prowess as he is once again holding down the fort outside of the
playoffs. I’ll also take the
customary runs at Buzz, although with this year’s version of the Liberals
looking somewhat decent, it will be a bit more difficult. At least we can still make fun of his
hair.
Without any further wasted time, let the predictions begin.
Liberals
Predicted Finish: 1st
Speaking of the Liberals, let’s get this out of the way.
The first position in Rick’s Picks has
become more about the curse, and less about who we think is actually going to
win. For the first time in a decade,
the Liberals have a team that actually made me take notice, and because if Buzz
actually won it would be just unbearable, the Liberals draw this year’s curse
card and a huge anchor around Buzz’s neck.
Yes, clearly this team has holes, but the wing corps harkens back to a
time when the Liberals would always dominate this position. Louie Ericksson, Bobby Ryan, Ville
Leino and Thomas Vanek isn’t going to blow anybody’s skirt up, but at least
they’re all decent…and for once, all healthy.
A defence led by a healthy Sergei Gonchar (curse #3 by the way if anyone
wants to count) might be good enough, and a healthy Jason Spezza is a good start
up the middle…although in terms of support for Spezza, Travis Zajac has bombed
harder than a vegetable platter at a Leeson family BBQ. Nice use of 78 schmill Buzz. At least Carey Price has managed to
keep the ghost of Jaroslav Halak out of his head long enough to get out to a
decent start. Every team at this
time of the year has holes, and we see no better reason than to place this
year’s version of the Liberals atop of the heap.
OK, truth be told, we see him finishing 4-6 but if there was any chance,
we had to play the curse card.
Comox Crunch
Predicted Finish: 2nd
Another team with solid potential, but also solid holes is
the Crunch. With names like
Alfredsson, Briere, Kovalchuk, Cammalleri and some guy named Bergfors, they have
excellent talent on the wing.
Kovalchuk hasn’t exactly lit the Big Swamp on fire, but he’s got to get better
doesn’t he? If the wings don’t carry
the team, the back end certainly will.
The ageless Nicklas Lidstrom is doing it again with better than a point a
game, and Kris Letang is finally scoring like the so called experts have been
calling for. Add that Mike Green is
back healthy and you’ve got a back end J Lo would be proud of. Joe Thornton is a bit lonely up the
middle, but Jimmy Howard clearly has the chops to be an elite goalie. In looking at the checks for success
in the HHL – high end talent, at least 2 quality d-men, some high end rookies to
trade if you need to, and a better than average goalie – the Crunch tick them
all and may be holding yet another parade in downtown Comox this April. Damn them!
Disco Godfathers
Predicted Finish: 3rd
On the odd occasion, one player can carry an entire team well
beyond what anyone ever expected.
May we introduce you to the 2010 version of the Godfathers. Outside of Steven Stamkos, this team
is about as hot as Commissioner Livingstone in a speedo. Sure, Corey Perry is great on the
wing, but when Scott Hartnell is your #2, you’ve got big problems. At least when he had the big hair he
was sort of fun to cheer for, but now he’s just another slow redhead with bad
hands. Tobias Enstrom is proving to
be worth the dough Barry spent on him prior to the draft, but once again, after
the #1, talent falls off faster than when the lights come on at the Roxy. Cam Fowler was a good risk, but the
rest are complete bums. Up the
middle, Eric Staal is definitely a good second centre and between him and Corey
Perry, the reason I’m picking this team so high.
Poor Staal is stuck in Carolina though so his point production will
always be about 20% less than it could be if he was on a better team. Jonathan Quick isn’t going to be
remind anyone of Johnny Bauer between the pipes, but when you’re the starter in
LA these days, points are going to be a given.
That said, I hope he pulls a Sami Salo and slips getting out of the
shower breaking every bone in his body so Bernier gets some damn playing time!
Dynasty
Predicted Finish: 4th
Losing by 2 points for the second time was very tough to take
for Dynasty GM Rick Ramsbottom.
Losing to a team that counted Keith Yandle, Mike Knuble and Antoine Vermette was
a bit much…oh well, at least Buzz and Pringle missed the playoffs again. This year’s version of the Dynasty
isn’t quite as stacked, but they can still make some noise. Although the depth after Patrick Kane
and Martin St. Louis is about as strong as Toyota’s 4th quarter sales
(seriously, did I really pay $50M+ for David Perron again!), two high end guys
like this are few and far between.
On the back, Lubo Visnovsky is proving to be worth every bit of the $58M it took
to sign him, and Erik Karlsson is finally starting to come around. Brian Campbell is finally
healthy (for now) so Ramsbottom has fingers crossed, no additions are needed
here because help is clearly needed between the pipes. With no decent goalies left,
Ramsbottom took a flier on rookie Johnathan Bernier…unfortunately, LA also has
this Quick guy who it turns out isn’t all that bad. At least this creates an obvious
opportunity to gain a number of points with one re-draft pick-up.
Up the middle, the Dynasty are stronger than most teams in
the HHL – Mikko Koivu (thanks Jose), Patrick Marleau (thanks Barry), and Jeff
Carter (thanks Cole) are all studs and should improve on their OK starts.
Rarr’s Rage
Predicted Finish: 5th
For once, we actually don’t mind Stew’s team. Again, there are clearly holes that
need to be addressed, but the fact is, they’re not bad. Although we’re most thankful that
Wojtek Wolski now calls Skookumchuck home, Alexander Semin and Claude Giroux
more than pick up the slack. Giroux
looks to have finally broken out after a few years of promise. Evander Kane is probably another year
or two away, but he could fill the #4 hole very nicely. That said, although Andrei Kostitsyn
is off to a nice start, we all know
that won’t continue. This guy is
softer than Gordon Campbell’s approval ratings and is sure to tank. Whitney, McCabe, Weber and Subban are
a nice d-group and while not spectacular, should be good enough. The centre position is clearly the
black hole for the dark lord of dump however.
Wilson obviously shared a few bottles of Jack Daniels with Calgary GM
Darryl Sutter on a recent hunting trip because what else could explain the
pick-up of Olli Jokinen. This guy is
done, and is destroying Jarome Iginla in the process! Vinny Lecavalier should be doing
better when healthy, but he still unfortunately has no one to play with and the
rest of the group isn’t worth wasting time on. At least Wilson fluked out with
the drafting of Michael Neurvith, and between this hot rookie and Rage stalwart
Mikka Kiprusoff, the net is well protected.
Who knows, one or two lopsided trades with a few Cranbrookians after a
mushroom filled game of Dungeons & Dragons, and the Rage could contend.
The Greeks
Predicted Finish: 6th
Honestly, we don’t buy the great start, and believe that one
player can only take you so far, but for fun, let’s give Jimmy some hope. Teemu Selanne may be older than dirt,
but who knows, he’s one of the best pure goal scorers the HHL has ever seen and
he could have one more good year left.
We’ve never heard of Jeff Skinner but 16 points in 20 games is nothing to
shake a stick at, so let’s keep rolling…James Neal is a good complimentary
player and Rick Nash is Rick Nash so the points will come eventually. Not a bad group on the wing. Outside of Jack Johnson, the D sucks
though...any money spent on Jay Bouwmeester was a waste, and we just love
watching Neon Dion flame out in Toronto.
You’ve got to love Mike Richards as your #1 centre, and Ryan Kesler is
finally coming on. The rest however
reek like Roberts Creek at low tide, but who cares…when Jaroslav bloody Halak is
minding the net, all is good. Halak
is on pace for something like 150 points so if he can just break 100, it might
be enough to squeeze Homer into the playoffs.
Kevlar
Predicted Finish: 7th
In each of the last two seasons, Kevlar has finished in the 7
hole and we don’t see things changing much this year. Yes, they have Crosby and Malkin at
centre, and that tends to cure most ills, but for the past 5-6 years, GM Kev
Tyfting has been unable to surround these two stars with anything even
resembling talent. Yes, buying
Patrick Sharp from the Dynasty is paying off in spades, and stealing Duncan
Keith from the same Dynasty also proved to be a shrewd move. After that though, Kevlar’s
management style would remind HHL fans more of Stu Jackson than Red Auerbach. I would rather not run through this
collection of stiffs because I don’t have the time, nor do I want to waste my
energy and semi-decent rips with the likes of Jason Pominville, Martin Erat, or
Zach Bogosian…I’d rather save them for Chaos!
Korean Assassins
Predicted Finish: 8th
The theme in this year’s HHL is definitely teams with a few high end performers,
and an inevitable collection of stiffs.
The Assassins fit this trend to a T, thanks to high performers Daniel
Sedin, John Michael Liles, Derek Roy and Roberto Luongo. Add to this group Nathan Horton, Alex
Edler and Joe Pavelski and you’ve got a good but not great core. Andrei Markov
would certainly count amongst this group as well but he’s had about as much luck
staying healthy as Walli has in skipping the 3pm trip to Tim Horton’s. From here, the talent falls off the
table like Buzz’s wallet when it’s time to pay the tab…the worst of the bunch is
probably Chris Kunitz. Not because
he’s all that bad a player, but how frustrating must it be to have him score 12
points in his first 22 when he plays every shift with Sidney freakin’ Crosby!
Hell, even Teddy could score more on Sid’s left side!
Team Chaos
Predicted Finish: 9th
I really had the knife sharpened for Chaos and was ready to
start carving when low and behold – Iggy woke up.
And when Iggy woke up, Alex Tanguay started to get assists. Before that eruption, this team was
down in the dumps, but led by Jarome, they have slowly pulled themselves up the
ladder. We have them at 9th,
but they could easily climb higher if the run continues. Now, there is no way Andrew Ladd is
going to continue scoring at a point a game pace, but we do see Scott Gomez,
Alexander Frolov, Dave Bolland and Nikita Filitov continuing to score like Jose
at the Pit Pub. These guys are such
stiffs it’s really unbelievable that Cole would ever sit fit to sign them. Back to the positive however, Brad
Richards has confirmed that he is back to Tampa Bay form, and even if he leaves
Dallas, he is once again the best thing about Chaos. Steve Mason is a good young goalie,
but we’re not buying Columbus’ hot start and can’t see him getting more than 80
points…in other words, very, very average.
Unfortunately for Chaos fans, average would be a step in the right
direction for this sad sack of a franchise.
The title hopes will need to wait yet another year.
Tri-City Flood
Predicted Finish: 10th
This once proud franchise is nowhere near what they used to
be. They start faster than Andrew
Marchand at a cougar convention with clear studs like Alex Ovechkin, Pavel
Datsyuk, and King Henrik Lundqvist, but there’s just not enough talent around
these guys. Brooks Laich is the best
of the rest along the wing, but when he’s your #2 at this point in the season,
you’ve got more trouble than ticket sales reps for the Abbotsford Heat. Brian Rafalski can still score and
isn’t a bad #1 guy on the back, but he can’t stay healthy now that he’s as old
as most HHL GM’s. Paul Martin is a
30 pt defenceman so he’s nothing to get excited about. Hell, there’s more talent at the Poco
Rec Centre on a Friday night! Tomas
Plekanec and Matt Duchene are fine for depth centres, but just not all that
exciting. Like Chaos, this team
could very easily make the playoffs, but the group needs a serious talent
upgrade in a whole bunch of areas.
The Krew
Predicted Finish 11th:
After losing to this bum by 2 points last year, we just love
dumping him into the downtrodden of the HHL.
We have just one question…where did all the talent go? Yes, Henrik Sedin and Dany Heatley
are just fine thank you very much, but it’s sure nice to see Marian Gaborik
finally pull a Sami Salo. With
Gaborik hurt, Jussi Jokinen needs to step up and that’s not going to happen long
term. On the back, Keith Yandle and
Christian Ehrhoff are softer than Commissioner Livingstone’s abs. Speaking of the back, Erik Johnson is
such a huge disappointment…5 points in 19 games must really put even further
sting on the infamous Patrick Kane deal…22 in 22 if you’re counting at home by
the way for Mr. Kane. At least the
Krew has Ilya Bryzgalov in goal again so he could save the day yet again with a
gazillion shutouts. Don’t bet your
house on it though.
Los Diablos
Predicted Finish: 12th
Challenging the Dynasty for the best group of centremen is
Los Diablos. A one-two of Ryan
Getzlaf and Jonathan Toews is about as good as you get, and although Mike
Ribeiro seems to be about as hated as the HST, he is scoring again in Big D and
seems to be out of Coach Crow’s dog house.
Follow that with big Dustin Byfuglien on the wing, or even better, on the
back, and you’re off to a nice start.
Unfortunately for Diablos fans (all 5 of them), the fun stops there. Tyler Ennis, Johan Franzen, Dustin
Brown and Ryan Smyth are all decent names, but unfortunately, they’ve scored
about as many goals as Buzz has sold comic books.
The entire d-corps is a waste of air, and Marty Turco, while actually
playing quite well, can’t seem to buy a point with the struggling Hawks. We think Turco, and the Hawks, will
turn things around, but not in enough time for the Diablos to challenge for a
playoff spot. At least you have a
good logo. Thanks again for the
donation.
Walli’s Jets
Predicted Finish: 13th
Oh Walli, this is what happens when you play the role of
absentee owner…and leave Buzz and Davie to draft your team!
You lay the foundation with Zetterberg, Chara, Doughty and
Backstrom and they supplement with Brian Gionta, Devin Setoguchi, Shane Doan and
lord help us Patrick Bergland! On
top of this, Marty Brodeur is old and while his number will surely rise to the
rafters at the Winnipeg Memorial Arean, he looks like a dried out apple fritter
out there. Honestly, I think the
Jets will finish way higher than this, but I’m pissed that Walli pulled a no
show at the draft so lucky 13 for him!
Spanish Bitches
Predicted Finish: 14th
Is this really the GM who ravaged the HHL for the better part
of a decade? You can’t help but
think of Lou Lamarillo, but without the meddling owner. What happened Jose? We know you’re not getting any sleep
but that seemed to actually improve Stew’s draft day performance. Yes Chris
Stewart was a nice find, but you used to pluck stars from the bottom rounds
better than Ken Holland. Now you
actually give someone money for Martin Havlat (thank you by the way), expect
Brent Seabrook to all of a sudden score, stand by Matt Carle, and waste picks on
Nicholai Zherdev and Alexei Ponikarovsky!
Add these stiffs to the painful commitment you somehow continue to show
to Alice Hemsky and Valterri Flippula and you’re wading into Professor Kim
territory. You had better hope Tim
Thomas breaks his leg, and Anze Kopitar starts scoring like Gretzky in the 80’s
or you could be staring down two straight loser tax years. I thought that would be about as
likely as Mike Gillis playing twister with Commissioner Livingstone, but with
your performance to date, I have two words for Mike and Commish... Spoon on!
Softcore
Predicted Finish: Dead Last
Speaking of absentee owners, I actually felt sorry for the
guy Barney sent to the draft this year.
He seemed nice enough but was absolutely clueless…shows you what Barney
thinks of the Commissioner’s drafting prowess.
The Core are 20 points behind the next worse team and are getting worse
every day. Hell, they are reminding
everyone of the HHL’s version of the NY Islanders. No talent, no potential, no hope. Somewhere Marco Sturm is laughing.
Fini